Humanimals (1989)

Tracklist:

1. SCG Minus 3: Scarctic Circle Telethon
2. Borderline
3. Victims of the Romance
4. Heart of a Lion
5. The Bullet Bites Back
6. Be My Maniac
7. Rucking Up the Party
8. Girl in a Suitcase
9. Supernatural
10. Like a Bee to the Honey
11. Humanimal

And on disc number five we have ‘Humanimals’. We have  jumped over to the eighties in the meanwhile, the glory days of the so called album oriented rock or AOR. Inspired by the likes of Bon Jovi, Toto, FM , Foreigner or ‘Poison’era Alice Cooper, they racked up a score of radio friendly tunes. After a televangelist warns us for the harmful effects of Lordi’s satanic music, we get taken on another trip down memory lane. Well, at least for those of us old enough to actually remember the eighties or know it second hand through episodes of Stranger Things, that is. As far as pastiches go, this one is really well done. If you’re also into The Night Flight Orchestra, then you’ll lap this up as well, for sure.  The songs are really that good. In fact, if you take away the cheeky lyrics this would actually be a great AOR record in its own right.

As with everything in the Lordiverse, this is done with their tongue firmly planted in their cheek. The songs all sound like super poppy romantic ear candy coming straight out of your cassette player, but the lyrics aren’t really about cosy smooching with your girlfriend. For instance the line “I got every part of you so we’ll carry on” and  “you will be with me forever and ever” gets a somewhat less romantic connotation in a song like ‘Girl in a suitcase’.

The songs are bursting out of their way too skinny denim with lofty keyboards, singalong choruses, bittersweet soloing and a video store full of soft rock tropes. The already well-known track ‘Like a Bee to the Honey’, a hidden gem written by Paul Stanley and Jean Beauvior, even brings in some sexy sax playing through a guest appearance by Michael Monroe himself and a ‘Thriller’ style spoken word sequence. Once again the last song is more a ballad, and after ‘Like a Bee to the Honey’ another track co-written by the legendary Jean Beauvoir. This title track is devised from the finest pomp rock, as bloated as Meatloaf himself and so sugar sweet you’ll need an insulin shot before you can move on to next disc.